Personal Epiphanies on Weight Loss

Today I had a personal epiphany or two on weight loss. I have struggled with my weight since graduating university 15 years ago. At that time I wanted to lose 20 pounds, now I'd like to lose 60. Before I really began struggling with my weight, I made some comments about weight gain that were hurtful, stupid and ignorant. Today I know how much those comments hurt, because I've received the same ones myself. There is nothing I could say to take away the pain caused, but I now know and have known for some time how much it hurts and how deeply sorry I am for the thoughtless comments. Now for the epiphanies.

1. I know that if someone I cared about were to lose weight, I would be deeply happy for them. However, whether they lost or agained 100 or more pounds, would not change one iota how much I care for, love and appreciate them. I know (now) the same is true in their regard and love for me, I didn't know this, in my heart, yesterday. I might have known it had someone pointed it out to me, it's pretty obvious.


2. Although the love and care my friends have for me would not change based on any weight loss or gain, how I feel about myself would change. I've lost the weight once, and I felt free. I can't say I was completely happy with myself or my body, I didn't feel as happy or attractive as I thought I might, but I did feel free. Free from what you might ask. Free from the weight, from putting myself down when clothing didn't fit or look as good as I would have liked it to look. Free from comments about my weight.

I've begun a new weight loss journey and my motto (when I remember it) has been that "I'm practicing being healthier" so I won't eat perfectly every day. I've lost 6 pounds over the last month, maybe with my new epiphanies, and if I put my motto in places where I will see it every day, I'll feel better about whatever progress I do make.