Sunday, June 07, 2009


Last cycle I was on Puregon. For 3 weeks straight I was angry, mad, annoyed, pissed, aggravated...I think you get the point. Usually when I become angry I can take timeout to think about what is triggering the anger and deal with the issue to resolve the anger, I don't yell. I know now that it was primarily the drugs, but it was really hard month. Well no baby this month.

I'm taking a week off work to relax. I've also thought a lot about whether to take some time off cycle monitoring or continuing. Being an analyst, I decided to make a list for each. Here it is.

Keep going:
1 year of cycle monitoring has already been paid for
I really want to have a baby
I'm not getting any younger (I'll be 37 in Sept)
DH could be out of town for 6 months effectively ending any more ttc'ing until he returns
Stopping the drugs - it could take my body months to return to normal cycling - i.e. ovulating and producing enough progesterone

Stop for 1 cycle (maybe more)
Doesn't feel like the right thing to be doing to get pregnant
Hasn't felt like the right thing since the beginning of the second cycle (I've done 4 now)
Cost of IUI (DH is unemployed and can't afford anything extra in June)
Hormonally induced emotional breakdowns (left work in tears last cycle and broke down crying 2 other times during the same cycle)
Stress levels at work until July are very high, and not conducive to conception

So I've decided to take a month off of cycle monitoring, including no BBT to see if there's a temperature shift. Right now I think I might go see an accupuncturist, but I haven't make the appointment yet, and for me thinking about and making the acctual appointment are pretty far apart (even if I am pretty sure I should at least try it).

Anyway, I have this week off, and I'm trying not to look at anything work related. I thought it would be hard because I've been working every night and weekend for months, but I shutdown my computer and black.berry on Friday after work and have absolutely no desire to even contemplate work.

I was hoping the coming week would be nicer out, I was thinking of going to the local amusement park and art gallery. I can still go to the art gallery, but the amusement park would suck in the rain, and since it's not supposed to be very warm then the waterslides would not be much fun either.

I guess I'll do reading and gardening instead.


Julie Julie Bo Boolie said...

Well if you're free Tuesday I'd love to meet for breakfast at Cora's and then a haunt through the Chapters on Hwy 7 :) Chloe'll be in school so we could take our time.


Jenn said...

And then maybe on Wednesday we could do lunch or something :)

odat_kim said...

OK, Tuesday breakfast, Wednesday lunch :)

hope548 said...

Oh sister, I have been there. It's hard wanting to press on, but needing a break. Hopefully this break will help you regroup and figure out the next steps. I really liked acupuncture and did notice some positive changes in my cycle while I was being treated.
Enjoy your time off.